Special Needs parenting: I gained Calmness

 I was that girl who entertained a lot of anxiety. I will be anxious about just anything... questions like, what will happen if...what ifs and the Why's and why not's never seemed to leave my mind.

I was always trying to find answers, so describing myself as calm was never it.

On the surface, I looked like a calm person but underneath was an anxious girl who worried unnecessarily about just anything.

Then life happened, the universe gifted me with the most wonderful gift ever, a lovely daughter.

Her life came with an interesting twist, she has cerebral palsy, and it was as if my life had come to an end.

Having a daughter with cerebral palsy to me was the most unexpected thing that ever happened in my life.

Have you read my book The Unexpected, it tells a part of my story. Check on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Unexpected-Pain-Gain-Adwoa-Okorewaa-ebook/dp/B08CGP6D59

To be able to embrace and accept my daughter, I needed to heal, heal from anxiety, heal from holding grudges, heal from bitterness, heal and purge myself off from the unnecessary things that so weigh us down.

It was as if I was being flooded with the things I feared the most in life but I am a fighter so I decided to fight back for me healing. To heal from anxieties, to heal from holding grudges, to heal from bitterness

To embrace love, to embrace calmness and to trust God.

Being a Christian helped, praying and meditating came to the rescue. I meditated for answers.

Years down the line, I realized that I no longer reacts to things that I hitherto reacted to.

I understand that the Universe has my biggest interest, you know what the scripture says, I know the plans I have for you, plan of good and not of evil to bring me to an expected end.

Now one of my favorite Mantras is "I don't chase, I attract, what belongs to me will surely find me."

I remind myself never to be desperate for anything, not even for the healing of my daughter.

I believe that Healing will find us one day

When I look back, I think I have gained Calmness, not in totality but it is a process, I improve everyday

And it has been worth every lesson

PS: Writing is my hobby turned job and I love sharing my thoughts and insight

The Special Mothers Project is an Advocacy programme on cerebral palsy issues and issues affecting families raising children with Disabilities